


My Solace

by Li_no



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Fluff, Holding Hands, M/M, also they hold hands bc thats the dimileth thing, first time writing for fe fandom also dont mind me, hope u enjoyy, its kinda sad but its cute but sad you know, my take on byleth, there is a lot of feelings here, they kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-18
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-09-06 16:14:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20294335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Li_no/pseuds/Li_no
Summary: Byleth finds a Dimitri plagued by nightmares in the cathedral. Of course, he needs to help.





	My Solace

**Author's Note:**

> Hellooo fire emblem gang, thats my first time writing for the fandom even tho ive been in the fe hellhole for quite some time now. i love dimitri hes probably my favorite fe character now, and i also wanted to share my take on byleth to you all! hope you like it

Amongst so many other things in Byleth's life that were cruelly out of his grasp, sleep had proven itself to be one of them. No matter how much Byleth wished to, slumber still evaded him.

He found himself wandering the Monastery at night quite often. Probably not a particularly wise decision, as even a misplaced swing of his sword could cost him his life in those woefully war plagued times. 

The smell of blood and sight of that abhorrent carnage would never fail to make Byleth sick, a thing perhaps hypocritical of him to feel, as he used to live as a sellsword until he became a teacher at the Officer's Academy, one would think that he should be used to such endeavors… Well, making that assumption would not be too far off from the truth, he lamented.

The cathedral was Byleth's final destination of his little night strolls, as always. He always felt at ease at the cathedral. Despite being the goddess herself, Byleth was not religious, far from it, the comfort the cathedral proportioned him was not tied to something as flimsy as faith, but rather, love for an old friend. Byleth missed Sothis, he thought, from the bottom of his heart. Only in the cathedral, he felt as if he could still hear her voice, reprimanding him, living alongside him. More than once he felt lost without her by his side. Byleth wondered what Sothis would say about his current predicament, and what she would say about the relationships he had formed.

As Byleth set foot on the decorated hall of the cathedral, he was able to see a familiar figure, standing idly and silently near the pile of rubble Edelgard's attack had left part of that place in.

"Professor?" Dimitri chimed, glancing worriedly at Byleth. "What are you doing awake at this hour?"

He approached Dimitri with steps so silent one could barely hear them. "Couldn't sleep." 

"Is that so." Dimitri laughed dryly. "I suppose it is us both."

The moon was the only source of light that was provided for them, it was remarkably difficult to notice details about anything in the scene, and yet, as he always did when it involved Dimitri, Byleth made sure to observe every aspect about him. Dimitri's eyes looked tired, his hair even more disheveled than usual and his voice hoarse. Something had certainly happened.

"Nightmares?" Byleth asked, worry concealed in his almost indifferent tone of voice.

"Perhaps." Dimitri chuckled, a poor attempting at hiding the sadness that lurked within.

_ "Dimitri," _ Byleth glared at him, anger evident in his voice. Dimitri's indifference towards himself made Byleth incredibly irritated, for someone who concealed his emotions as well as Byleth, he couldn't help it when it was about Dimitri. He never could.

Dimitri sighed. "Professor, you mustn't concern yourself over my… rather troublesome dreams. The nightmares are so frequent you could call them routine for one such as myself."

Before he himself could realize, Byleth felt his fists clench in anger towards something he couldn't say. Was it directed at how the world had treated Dimitri, or himself? For having abandoned the person he loved, leaving him to struggle against his own demons all alone for five years?

Byleth gulped, scared to where his own thoughts and what ifs would dare lead him. "What was it about?" 

“There is no need to-”

“I want to know.” He did his best to appear firm in his words, even if he was so very afraid of the answer.

“...Very well then, if you so insist, I could never deny a request coming from you.” He cleared his throat. “My family, the voices I hear on the daily… Let’s just say they don’t leave me in my dreams. The lifeless body of my father, my stepmother being engulfed by flames, it’s a sight carved deep within my brain. No matter how hard I try, I can never be rid of it, I suppose you are aware of this much. I can normally sleep after, since I’m living with these dreams for nine years now, however,” Stopping abruptly, Dimitri stared into Byleth’s eyes. “This time, you were there, too. Shortly after our march to Enbarr commenced, you were attacked, body falling flat on the ground, like so many others did.”

Dimitri was shaking, Byleth realized, his voice was so frail it seemed as if he was about to break at any moment. As tough as Dimitri appeared to be, to his subjects and soldiers, boasting his superhuman strength during all battles, Byleth was the one who would always know the truth about how vulnerable Dimitri was. In his eyes, Dimitri was neither a king nor a mighty warrior, but simply Dimitri.

Without any word needing to be uttered, Byleth silently took Dimitri’s hand in his, already feeling Dimitri’s body soften at the familiar touch. Many times, Byleth would merely hold his hand wordlessly, as a way to ground Dimitri into reality, not letting his mind wander once again and succumb to his shadows. This time, however, Byleth felt the need for words, as clumsy as they may be, coming from a reserved person such as himself, he was never one for words. “I’m here, aren’t I? And I will stay. With you.” He squeezed Dimitri’s hand tightly, trying to vanquish his sorrows with that touch alone.

Dimitri smiled warmly, Byleth couldn’t quite tell due to the poor illumination, but Dimitri was most likely red faced by now, he guessed, Dimitri was still not one who managed physical contact well, no matter how many intimate gestures they had shared in the past. Somehow, Byleth loved that side of him, too.

“Professor, I’m grateful to you, for never giving up on me, despite my many, many faults. I still cannot fathom why would someone such as you would go to such lengths for someone like me, guiding me when I was lost, giving me love and comfort… I… I most likely will never understand.” He stumbled upon his own words, his voice as low as a whisper. But Byleth would still hear, not matter how incomprehensible it may seem, he would understand without fail.

“Stop saying such foolish things,” Byleth rebated, irritation clouding his mind. “If you insist on calling me your light, I must say the same about yourself. You don’t realize, Dimitri, but you, too, pulled me from the darkness. I am not as perfect as I seem, nor do I possess all the answers.”

Dimitri raised an eyebrow in confusion. “My apologies, I don’t seem to be following?” 

Byleth took a deep, ragged breath. As long as he could remember, he never told anyone such things, always putting a strong front for his students so he could be seen as a capable figure for them to depend on. However, Dimitri was no longer his student. Dimitri was his partner, his equal, the person he cherished above all, he was certain of at least this much in his life, if not much else.

“Before I met you, one could say I was truly a monster. I killed without much thinking, as a daily duty to be accomplished, I felt nothing, not sadness, not anger, not despair, none of it. Frankly, I’m not so sure if I could even be considered a human being.” Byleth maintained his firm posture as much as he managed. Refusing to meet Dimitri’s eyes, he continued. “You were the one who taught me all of that, you taught me happiness, you taught me sadness. You said I taught you how to live, but you taught me the importance of life, which was yet unknown to me. I’m not so sure that I would have shed tears on the death of my own father, if were not for the time you and the others spent with me, by my side.”

Dimitri must have caught on Byleth’s poor acting of composure, he noticed, as Dimitri squeezed his hand tighter, coming even closer to Byleth. His body was shaking all over, not sure how to deal with the amount of information he had disclosed about himself to another person. He couldn’t say he was used to that.

“You were the one who told me, when I was at my lowest, to forgive myself, weren’t you?” He caressed Byleth’s cheek gently. “Will I have to use your own advice with you, professor?”

Byleth laughed softly, putting his hand above Dimitri’s. “I sure hope not, that would be quite pitiful.”

Closing the distance between them, Byleth initiated the kiss. A soft, short kiss, illuminated by the faint moonlight that showered both of them. Byleth wondered if he would ever be able to kiss Dimitri like this again in this cathedral, but as his spouse instead if they survived the war. No, they would definitely make it through alive. Together.

They parted their lips. Byleth looked at Dimitri fondly. “Love is an emotion I thought I would never be able to fully grasp, and yet here I am, with you. I’ll always be grateful to you for that, and for everything you’ve ever done for me. So please, never put yourself down again, it pains me how you fail to see your own brilliance.”

Due to the proximity, this time Byleth was fully aware of the blush in Dimitri’s cheeks. “You are going to kill me with these words one of these days, I remember when you didn’t talk much.” He laughed awkwardly.

“And you have no one other than yourself to blame for this change,” Byleth leaned his forehead in the other’s. “Just know that your burdens aren’t yours alone to bear. When you have nightmares, I beg of you, go to my quarters. I don’t want you to suffer alone ever again. Let me correct my wrongdoings of having vanished from your life for five years and make up for the lost time.”

Giving a quick kiss to Byleth’s cheek, Dimitri finally responded. “You don’t need to correct anything. However, I feel as if I don’t do as you say, you’ll never leave me be.”

Once again, Byleth smiled, fulfilled. The very same smile Dimitri and his students had taught him, and that he had learned to treasure with his whole soul.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading up until now! if you wanna scream at me hit me up on twitter dot cum @heartfvlcry also comments are always very appreciated~


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